Gossip

"Didja hear, didja hear, didja hear?" the knife blurted out to the fork he found himself placed next to in the washer. "Nah, didn't," the fork replied and went back to playing rock-paper-scissors with the vegetable peeler. "Don'tcha wanna hear?!" the knife insisted. "Nah, not really," countered the fork, "kinda busy here." "You won't BELIEVE it!", the excited knife said, and suddenly he burst into tears. Oh, lordy, here we go again, thought the fork. "Aw, knife, come on now. Tears? Really? A waste of time in a dishwasher! OK, tell me all about it." "Oh, fork, it's just such a tragedy!" blubbered the knife. "It's about spoon. You remember spoon?" "Sure, I remember spoon," replied the fork, thinking, spoons, they're all alike. "Well, remember how spoon was engaged to bowl, they met at the ice cream social and hit it off so well, they were just incomprehensibly inseparable" they were what? thought the fork "they were just so in LOVE, and now spoon, oh my God, spoon has run away with the dish!"